Flash Fic Challenge – 25 Minutes Into the Future

Another writing challenge, and this is my odd response. There were too many good photos to just pick one, so I picked a few. Hope you enjoy my brief dip into sketch comedy.

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25 Minutes Into the Future

*computer boots up, ad starts to play*

V/O (Cheerful, male): Unsure of what to do with your excess cloned Hitlers? At Hitler University, we train your Hitler to do many time consuming chores, giving you more time to enjoy the good life! Send us your uncoordinated, megalomaniac Hitlers, and we’ll send them back to you gifted in the art of lawnmower repair or kitchen maintenance! There’s no reason to junk your Hitler when we can turn them into productive members of society. Click on the link below for more information!

* ad fades out, new ad fades in *

* a picture of an ear of corn flashes by almost subliminally fast *

* the word CYBER moves slowly across the screen, in a golden digital font *

V/O (woman’s voice, sexy and whispering): Cyber corn. Catch it!

* ad fades out, new one fades in *

V/O (authoritative, male): At the Tempe Medical Institute, the patient’s needs come first. If you have a bum ticker and feel the need to replace it with a mechanical one or a specific pig heart, we can help you. If you think your migraines are best treated by crack, we can help you. If you’ve lost an arm, and want to replace it with a factory farmed rainbow trout, we can help you. At the Tempe Medical Institute, we believe the patient knows what’s best for them. And if you can pay for it, we can help you.

* ad fades out, new ad fades in *

* shot of a sunny, tropical beach, with golden sand and turquoise water. Camera slowly pulls out, until we see part of a beach chair, with the leg of a woman visible, and a tall, tropical drink propped on the arm of the chair *

V/O (soothing male, wave sounds in deep background) : Wouldn’t it be nice if you could go on vacation every night? If all your stresses just melted away …

* a waiter in a white coat comes into frame, holding a tray with a large slice of cake upon it *

… and you got a delicious treat at the end?

* smash cut to the interior of a typical bedroom, where a man reclines in bed, resting his head on a thickly iced cake * V/O: Cake pillows. Because you deserve it.

* ad fades out, new ad fades in *

* the picture of an ear of corn flashes by almost subliminally fast *

* the word CYBER moves slowly across the screen, in a golden digital font *

V/O (woman’s voice, sexy and whispering): Cyber corn. Catch it!

*ad fades out, new ad fades in *

* shot of an orchard from above, slowly zooming in on a single apple during voiceover *

V/O (female, scholarly) : Genetic modification has improved our lives in a million ways. It has made food heartier, more nutritious, better able to withstand the ravages of climate change and mutating diseases, as well as more flavorful. We here at Glaxxom Pharmaceuticals are proud of our work helping to enrich the crops that make America strong. We are also aware that there have been serious issues with some of our Evergrow Sunshine Apples ™, and we are working with the Department of Agriculture to fix the problem. If you still have Evergrow Sunshine ™ trees in your orchard, please call our help line, 1-888- FIX-TREE, or click the link below.

* close up on an apple on a tree, which appears to have a human mouth, and is currently chewing on a piglet’s leg, which slowly disappears inside its mouth *

V/O: Because fruit should nourish you, not the other way around.

* ad fades out, new ad fades in *

* open on a crystal blue ocean, which the camera swoops toward as the voiceover continues *

V/O (women, soothing) : Seventy percent of the Earth’s surface is covered in water. Some scientists say that we have not yet found all the wonders of the sea. Our water is as blue as the sky, and just as vast …

* camera plunges into water *

V/O: … so why not explore it …

* camera suddenly zooms in on a nun in full habit, floating underneath the waves as fish school behind her in a very loose crucifix pattern *

V/O: … with Our Lady of Ociana Underwater Church?

* organ sting *

V/O: The first church not on land officially recognized by the Catholic Church. Come plumb the depths of your faith while plumbing the depths of our oceans. Heaven is just a swan dive away.

* ad fades out *

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